A Hole in the Door and a Sword in my Chest

In this scary dream, I was in my apartment sleeping when I was awoken by a noise coming from right outside my front door.  I got up to check it out and was shocked to see that a small hole had been cut in my door and a hand was reaching in to try and undue the lock.  The person must have heard me and quickly jerked their hand away.  A couple of seconds later a large sword was thrust through the hole and the blade just missed my stomach.

I grabbed his wrist and started pulling hard and he dropped the sword.  However, he was able to free up his hand and pulled it back through.  Knowing he didn’t have his weapon, I bent down to look through the hole and immediately another blade was coming toward my right eye.  I pulled back and the blade missed my face but hit me square in the chest and I woke up instantly.

Stepping on Knives and Throwing Scissors

In this strange dream, I was running through the woods with some guy I didn’t know, chasing after my brother and a group of his friends.  I thought it was perhaps a recreational event – like capture the flag or paintball – until I stepped on the handle of a large hunting knife and it flew straight up, nearly piercing my face.  As I kept running, I stepped on a few more knives with the same result every time.  We stopped and the guy said, “Let me take care of this.”

Before I could object, he had doused a rag with gasoline and lit it on fire.  He then threw the flaming rag in the direction of my brother and his friends.  When the rag landed it triggered a huge explosion so we walked off in the other direction.  As we were walking we looked down at a parking lot and saw the group of guys getting into one of their SUVs.  We were at least 100 yards away but with all my might a chucked a pair of scissors at them.  Surprising, they made it to the parking lot and landed close to them.  However, they didn’t even notice and got in their car and drove away.

I’m Skiing….No Wait, I’m Flying

In this cool flying dream, I was at the Heavenly Valley ski resort in South Lake Tahoe, ready for a day of skiing.  It was Spring time so there was not a lot of snow, especially at the base of the mountain.  As I skied further down the hill, there was less and less snow until I was eventually skiing on dirt.  To my left there was a steep drop off but the mountain was covered in fresh snow and there was lots of it.

I decided to ski down this terrain and eventually went over this small jump.  Once I got elevated I kept climbing higher until I was flying over the large pine trees.  I flew for a while until I was eventually over Lake Tahoe and then I started to descend quickly.  I landed in the lake and glided across the water until I quickly hit the shore, which turned out to be the base of the ski resort.

No San Francisco Street Signs in New York

In this funny dream, I was driving in NY City with my parents and we were completely lost.  We wanted to get back to California and were looking for road signs to San Francisco but of course didn’t see any.  I pulled off on an exit, which led us to a golf course.  I was on the first tee box with an older guy who was getting ready to tee off.  The hole was ominous as you had to drive over a massive canyon and the fairway on the other side was narrow and covered with sand traps.  The guy teed off with an 8 iron and hit his ball into the canyon.  His caddy suggested he club up and handed him a 7 iron.  The guy then hit his second shot into the canyon.

Then I was back in the car driving.  Even though we were in NY, the streets were extremely hilly and I was catching air since I was driving way too fast.  I blew past an exit that my Dad was convinced was the one we needed to take to get back to California.  He said, “Damn it, that was our exit!  Don’t you know where you’re going?”  I sarcastically replied, “No Dad, I was born in Northern California.  Remember?  You were there.”

Bridge Over Troubled Waters

In this strange dream, I was standing on the ledge of a large bridge with a good friend of mine.  We were about 100 feet up and were planning on jumping into the river below.  I could see lots of rocks and there were some shallow parts of the water so picking the right place to land was essential.  Without hesitation, my friend jumped and landed in a deep part of the river.  He yelled at me to hurry up and jump.

I decided I didn’t want my keys in my pocket so I threw them down to him.  They landed about 10 feet away from him and instantly sank so he dove down and retrieved them.  I was nervous but decided to just close my eyes, jump and hope for the best.  Next thing I knew I was in a deep part of the water, floating next to my friend.  I looked up at the bridge and it was now much smaller and only about 10 feet above the river.

Check Out Those Cans!

In this bizarre dream, I was driving on the freeway and to the right of me was a beat up flatbed pick-up truck.  The back of the truck was completely filled with aluminum cans and an attractive woman was sitting on top of them.  Of course some cans kept falling out onto the freeway and every time this happened, the driver would stop so the woman could get out and pick them up.  For some reason I stopped every time as well.

Next thing I knew, I was inside a garage with the woman and the man who was driving the truck.  They each grabbed one can from the back of the truck and set them upright on the cement floor.  In unison they jumped up and landed on top of their respective can in hopes of crushing them.  The cans didn’t budge so both of them were now balancing on top of their respective can.  I asked them, “Can I help you crush some cans?”  The woman replied curtly, “Don’t even think about touching our cans.”

New Shoes and Old Scotch

In this funny dream, I was riding in a car with my parents on a frontage road in my hometown in Northern California. My Dad was driving, my Mom was in the passenger seat and I was in the back by myself. My Dad suddenly decided that he needed to be on the freeway so he stepped on the gas and drove onto the sidewalk. Further up ahead on the sidewalk I saw written in bright orange letters the word, “jump,” which I thought was weird. Once my Dad drove on this “word” the car was immediately ejected into the air. We flew over a chain-linked fence and landed safely in the slow lane of the freeway and we were instantly moving at the same speed as the flow of traffic.

We got off the next exit and I noticed some very strange houses: one row of houses were all perched on 20-foot high metal poles and another group of houses were all very tall and narrow but also very curvy and painted in bright colors. We drove past them and ended up at a mall since my Dad wanted to buy some new sneakers. As we were walking through the mall he saw a bar and decided instead he was in the mood for some Scotch, which I thought was unusual since I had never seen my Dad drink Scotch before.

Millionaire Arms Dealer

In this action-packed dream, I was sitting outside a warehouse trying to figure out a way to get in, since I suspected there were arms dealers inside.  I was wearing all camouflage clothes and my face was painted black and green but I didn’t have any weapons.  I found an unlocked door and slowly opened it and quietly inched my way into the warehouse.

Inside there were dozens of rows of stacked wooden crates and I assumed they were all filled with illegal weapons.  Behind some nearby crates I heard some men talking so I made my way towards the source.  When I got close enough to see them, I was shocked to see that one of the guys was a good friend of mine and he was clearly in charge of the operation.  With him were two large henchmen equipped with automatic rifles.  One of the henchmen spotted me and they both started running towards me so I sprinted in the opposite direction.  I temporarily lost them so I climbed up to the top of a large stack of crates so I could attack them once they got close.

Then suddenly the crates came tumbling down and I fell hard onto the cement floor.  Before I knew what had happened, the two men had picked me up by my arms and were dragging me away.  They eventually sat me down on a small wooden chair and then my buddy appeared before me.   I said to him, “This is quite an operation you have here.”  To that he replied, “I plan to be a millionaire by January.”

The Dolphin Sea Lion King

In this funny dream, I was in a cave with an ex-girlfriend of mine.  We were sitting around a small fire talking when she asked me if I was dating anyone.  I told her I had met someone special, that we had been dating for a while and that I was very happy.  I could see this upset her so she quickly announced she was dating an awesome guy too, but I was sure she had made it up.

Then from outside the cave I heard faint sounds of someone screaming in excitement.  I ran outside the cave, looked up and saw this guy skateboarding down the side of a steep rocky mountain.  He was moving fast down the hill and eventually jumped right over me and the mouth of the cave.  When he landed he propelled himself off his skateboard and plunged into the large river that was at the base of the mountain.

He was submerged for a bit of time and when he finally surfaced, he was sitting on the back of what looked like a cross between a dolphin and a sea lion.  The strange animal glided gracefully across the water and brought the guy to shore.  When he got off the dolphin sea lion, he gently patted it on the head a few times and then it happily swam away.  My ex-girlfriend suddenly appeared at the mouth of the cave and said, “That’s my boyfriend.”

Laptop Roulette

In this crazy dream, I was hanging out in a bedroom with another guy I didn’t know.  I was sitting on the bed and he was sitting at a wooden desk typing on his laptop, which had an abnormally large screen.  I was accusing him of stealing my laptop – not the one he was working on – but he denied it adamantly.  I didn’t believe him so I pulled out a large silver revolver and fired a bullet through the middle of the screen.

Goin' Down to Southpark

In this very weird dream, I was with the kids from the TV show South Park but they were in human form, not cartoons.  We were crouched behind some shrubs, hiding from what looked the blob.  It was black, slimy and enormous and had two really big eyes.  It spotted us and quickly slithered towards us, so we ran into a nearby house.

We had a plan to kill the blob by putting tablets of heartburn medicine into one of those little black tubes that holds film and then filling it up with water.  We did this and then shook the small container vigorously.  We opened the front door of the house and the blob was in the front lawn, looking right at us.  Somebody yelled, “Now!” and I held up the film container and it shot out red laser beams directly into the eyes of the blob.  It screeched and then fell to ground dead.